I didn’t think much about that until 2006, when I was in eighth grade and my teacher assigned my class a genealogy project. We were supposed to research our family history and create a family tree to share with the class. In the past, whenever questioned about my father’s absence by friends or teachers, I wove intricate alibis: he was a doctor on call; he was away on business in Russia; he had died, prematurely, of a heart attack. In my head, I’d always dismissed him as my “biological father,” with that distant, medical phrase.
But the assignment made me think about him in a new way. I decided to call the U.N.C. fertility center, hoping at least to learn my father’s name, his age or any minutiae of his existence that the clinic would be willing to divulge. But I was told that no files were saved for anonymous donors, so there was no information they could give me.
In the early days of in vitro fertilization, single women and sterile couples often overlooked a child’s eventual desire to know where he came from. Even today, despite recent movies like “The Kids Are All Right,” there is too little substantial debate on the subject. The emotional and developmental deficits that stem from an ignorance of one’s origins are still largely ignored.
I quoted this one to begin adult Sunday school class this morning on Father’s Day. Read it all–KSH (emphasis mine).
From the Catholic Catechism
2376 Techniques that entail the dissociation of husband and wife, by the intrusion of a person other than the couple (donation of sperm or ovum, surrogate uterus), are gravely immoral. These techniques (heterologous artificial insemination and fertilization) infringe the child’s right to be born of a father and mother known to him and bound to each other by marriage. They betray the spouses’ “right to become a father and a mother only through each other.”1
Oh, no, no Already Gone (#1) – you have to realize it is always and ever only about the rights of the adults involved – never about the children and never about responsibilities. I think you need to engage in a better listening process.
Hmm! Link to the article is not working now. Any ideas. I searched the NYT on key words. No luck. Any ideas?
IHS,
NW Bob
Found the article through Google. God bless that boy. May he at least find comfort some day from his heavenly Father.
IHS,
NW Bob
#4 – blessing from his heavenly Father, yes – but not “at least” – God is not a ‘poor substitute’!
This is so darn sad.
God does have a wonderful healing Plan B – identity, comfort, nurture, life and belonging in Him, and in the Family of God.
Worship connects us to Him where He imparts His grace and love to us. In His presence is fulness of joy. Freedom. Peace. Eternal life.
Father, please find this young man and help him to find You.