Shortly before Toby Goldfisher Kaplowitz married two years ago, she went to a kallah teacher ”” a woman who prepares Orthodox Jewish brides to be intimate with their husbands.
The teacher spent most of her time going over how to observe the laws prohibiting physical contact between husband and wife during the woman’s menstrual period and for a week afterward. She described sex as “”˜so horrible, so painful, but said, ”˜I’ll give you some tips to deal with it,’ “ Ms. Goldfisher Kaplowitz recalled.
“I was really shocked,” she said. “I knew it was probably true for some women, but I didn’t want to be one of them.”
Today she teaches brides herself in Brookline, Mass., taking a very different approach.
Ms. Goldfisher Kaplowitz is part of a movement among more liberal Orthodox Jews toward open discussion of sexuality and sexual health.
“Sexuality needed addressing,” said Jennie Rosenfeld, director of Tzelem, a project housed at the Center for the Jewish Future, at Yeshiva University, that focuses on the topic. “Having grown up in the Orthodox community, it was too often a subject not spoken about, especially by people of authority, like teachers and rabbis, people who should be addressing it.”
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Among Orthodox Jews, More Openness on Sexuality
Shortly before Toby Goldfisher Kaplowitz married two years ago, she went to a kallah teacher ”” a woman who prepares Orthodox Jewish brides to be intimate with their husbands.
The teacher spent most of her time going over how to observe the laws prohibiting physical contact between husband and wife during the woman’s menstrual period and for a week afterward. She described sex as “”˜so horrible, so painful, but said, ”˜I’ll give you some tips to deal with it,’ “ Ms. Goldfisher Kaplowitz recalled.
“I was really shocked,” she said. “I knew it was probably true for some women, but I didn’t want to be one of them.”
Today she teaches brides herself in Brookline, Mass., taking a very different approach.
Ms. Goldfisher Kaplowitz is part of a movement among more liberal Orthodox Jews toward open discussion of sexuality and sexual health.
“Sexuality needed addressing,” said Jennie Rosenfeld, director of Tzelem, a project housed at the Center for the Jewish Future, at Yeshiva University, that focuses on the topic. “Having grown up in the Orthodox community, it was too often a subject not spoken about, especially by people of authority, like teachers and rabbis, people who should be addressing it.”
Read it all.