Five years ago, Tiffany Gardner learned she had another father. She already had two.
One had colon cancer and died when Gardner was 4 years old. Her adoptive father taught her to drive and walked her down the aisle at her wedding. At 35 years old, when Gardner received news of a third, “I remember the room spinning,” she said.
Gardner had been in her mother’s kitchen. During the conversation, her mother let go of a long-held secret about the man Gardner had long believed to be her father. He was in an accident, her mother said. He had to relearn how to walk and talk. I couldn’t get pregnant. The doctors said the accident had likely left him infertile. We used a sperm donor.
“I felt I was falling backwards trying to process the moment,” recalled Gardner, a lawyer in the Atlanta area and the mother of three boys. Among her feelings was a desire to meet her newly uncovered biological father. It didn’t take long to find him online.
“There’s nothing comparable to your genetic parent breaking up with you." Amazing journey from @AmyDMarcus on how we're defining family in the age of assisted fertility technologies and DNA testing. https://t.co/bLm7bgMuzo via @WSJ
— Stefanie Ilgenfritz (@stefaniei) June 16, 2023