[Peter] SAGAL: A swingers club is in this particular case – and this, I think, is typical of a certain segment of what is called the lifestyle – is a private home that is opened up to carefully vetted couples – couples only – that’s capital C, capital O – for people to come.
This particular place, again, typical, is set up as a kind of private social club. There’s drinks, there’s dancing, there’s conversation. There’s gaming. You want to play poker, a strip poker, anything else. There was a backgammon set. You can hang out. You can be socially. You can be convivial(ph). You can drink your own liquor, of course, because there’s no liquor license. It’s a private accommodation. And…
[Scott] SIMON: And you bring your own bottle…
SAGAL: You bring your own bottle.
SIMON: Like it’s a paint party or something.
SAGAL: Exactly, which you mark with a (unintelligible). And then, if everybody is off a mind, you and anybody who can sense can go off into rooms reserved for the purpose and pursue what everything, anything you want to pursue. It is always understood that this happens with the consent and often participation or at least witnessing of your partner. It is very straightforward.
SIMON: They seem to make a point of separating sex and love.
SAGAL: That is…
SIMON: At least the kind of sex…
SAGAL: …an explicit point. I mean…
SIMON: Yeah.
SAGAL: …this has nothing to do with intimacy. You’re confusing sex with intimacy, said the owner of the club to me, and I – to which my response should have been, well, doesn’t everybody? I mean, isn’t sex intimacy? I mean, isn’t it in fact almost a synonym? And to them it is not.
In a weird way, emotional attachment must be the kind of social disease that can ruin all the good times going on. That would be my supposition. Nina Hartley, the world’s most articulate porn star, who I also talked about in the book…
SIMON: Yeah.
SAGAL: She maintains that the idea of sexual orientation is far, far more complicated than the way we usually mean it – straight or gay. She thinks that it applies to all kinds of different interests, abilities, lack of abilities, enthusiasms, immunities, and I certainly think that this is true of this particular scene, that you have to be of a particular mind. You have to be the kind of person who not only thinks of sex in a particular way but feels it in a particular way, or rather maybe more to the point it doesn’t feel in a particular way to enjoy the scene.
—NPR’s Peter Sagal during an interview about his new book The Book of Vice: Very Naughty Things (and How to Do Them).